a longer list than i'd hoped for


Thursday, October 25, 2007

This week's regrets include:

1. Thinking All-Bran crackers are delicious and good for me. Well, they are both of those things. But they also have five grams of fiber per serving. I had three servings. If my intestines could speak, they would politely inform me that three servings is too many. Or they may say, "We quit. We're cleaning out our desks."

2. Running into a wall at work, just in time to see the CEO approaching and making direct eye contact. And this CEO isn't like the one at my last job, who might have shared a sandwich with me or asked me to scratch his back. This CEO is a bigger deal. It was a noisy bump. I was flustered. All I could think of to say was, "What the geez?!"

3. Admitting to the bishop's wife that for Halloween, I'm dressing up like a character from the world's most R-rated movie ever.

4. Watching a television program called Nova. Imagine a beautiful collage of sunrises and sunsets, children playing in the ocean and animals frolicking in their natural habitats... now add some soft orchestral music... and finally, the soothing voice of a sweet British woman informing you that unless we fix global warming in the next ten years, our earth will shrivel up and die before the turn of the century. Take that, frolicking animal. And... scene.

7 comments:

natali said...

i fell today in court. on my ass. in front of a judge.

becky said...

AAAAND.....the trump

Meghann said...

Fiber One breakfast bars do the same thing. It was so upsetting to learn because the peanut butter bars tasted so good, and so good for me. But since I sit in a cubicle surrounded by four other co-workers it was too much to contain. Unfortunately, I will never purchase them again.

Sarita said...

How bouts the time I spilled cranberry juice down my cleavage in my office, and just as I was putting my hand down my shirt to mop up the mess, my boss walks in.

I love that you admitted to your r-ratedness of your halloween costume. I mean, you may or may not be going to hell now, but at least it isnt because you are a liar. ;)

Jessica said...

Oh, I just bought those tonight at the store! Bless your heart for your honesty, but I am guessing you haven't seen Houes of a Thousand corpses or the sequel, The Devils Rejects. DON'T! Those are the worst rated R movies.

natali said...

look at the bright side bishops wives rarely know the most R rated movies and just think oh poor bill i hope he doesnt REALLY die.

Sarita said...

I dunno about that. I mean, when my dad was bishop, he and my mother went to their R movies across town so as to not be an excuse for the youth in families that had the no-R rated rule.

My parents are well versed in the language of R filmage.